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The Lives They Lived

Narrated by writers and contributors to The New York Times Magazine, Susan Dominus, Reginald Dwayne Betts and Linda Villarosa.

The stories of three of the thousands of American children killed by gun violence this year.

This transcript was created using speech recognition software. While it has been reviewed by human transcribers, it may contain errors. Please review the episode audio before quoting from this transcript and email transcripts@nytimes.com with any questions.

michael barbaro

From “The New York Times,” I’m Michael Barbaro. This is “The Daily.”

Every December, our colleagues at the “Times Magazine” devote an issue to remembering those who died during the previous year.

speaker 1

We called him Lemonhead. He got — his head’s shaped like a lemon head.

speaker 2

She was good at listening, like, when I wanted to talk about something.

speaker 3

He was just a wild child. I always called him my Tarzan, because he had really long hair.

michael barbaro

With gun violence now the number one cause of death for American children, the “Magazine” decided to remember those whose lives ended far too soon.

speaker 4

He skipped the walking and crawling phase. He went straight to running. He ran everywhere. Like I did — I never understood. I was like, why is he like this? [LAUGHS]

speaker 5

I remember the day his voice changed and I heard him in the background. And I’m like, who is that in your house? [LAUGHS]

michael barbaro

Kids from every corner of the country.

speaker 6

She was very shy, actually. She didn’t want a Sweet 16.

speaker 7

He was telling me how he’s like, yeah, I want to work out. I want to get taller.

michael barbaro

A disproportionate number of them Black boys.

speaker 1

He just had this big old, and when he smiled, it’s like, you remember that, you know?

michael barbaro

Today, the stories of three of those children told not through their deaths, but through the lives that they lived.

It’s Wednesday, December 21.

susan dominus

So maybe I could just start by asking you when you met her and how you first met her.

cheese

So I met her two years ago when I was around 12. Actually, it had just been my 12th birthday.

susan dominus

In September of 2020, a 12-year-old boy in Indiana fired up his laptop so he could play his favorite video game.

cheese

So I was on a “Minecraft” server, which is something that was probably a really big thing for me back then, and even now, I think I’ve spent most of my time on “Minecraft.”

susan dominus

And within minutes, he found someone he’d never met before.

cheese

So I got on, and there was only two people on the server — me, and another player named guineapigguard.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

So you might hear me referring to Shiway as Guinea a lot.

susan dominus

Uh-huh.

cheese

Because for a pretty big part of our friendship, I knew her as Guinea.

susan dominus

Do people intend to keep their real names a secret, or just like it never came up?

cheese

Well, it never really came up because it’s the internet. No one really like goes around saying, this is my real name, Hello.

susan dominus

[LAUGHS]: And what was your server name?

cheese

So I was Cheese.

susan dominus

Any reason for that?

cheese

I just liked Cheese.

susan dominus

Cheese needed an ally that day. guineapigguard was 11, a year younger than him, and lived in Minnesota. He asked if she would be on his team, and she said Yes. And that day, they won.

cheese

And so over the next couple of days, I would just like every once in a while message Guinea, hey, do you want to — do want to play Minecraft?

archived recording (cheese)

Hey guys, welcome. It’s me, Cheese, with Guinea.

archived recording (shiway barry)

Hello.

archived recording (cheese)

Yeah.

susan dominus

He began recording some of their games.

archived recording (shiway barry)

All right, so there is a skeleton down there. How much iron do you have

archived recording (cheese)

12.

susan dominus

The two of them found they were excellent teammates.

archived recording (shiway barry)

I have 22.

archived recording (cheese)

I have 21. We’re pretty close.

archived recording (shiway barry)

All right, so —

archived recording (cheese)

We should stick together, because you know —

susan dominus

Like at what point did you start to realize you liked this person? That it wasn’t just somebody who happened to be on all the time?

cheese

So it was probably about, like, a couple of months after we had first, become friends.

susan dominus

Mm-hmm.

cheese

And by then, I had also introduced Guinea to a lot of my other friends. And I’m like, wow, Guinea is very cool.

archived recording (shiway barry)

All right, where are you?

archived recording (cheese)

Here.

archived recording (shiway barry)

Can I trust you?

archived recording (cheese)

Yeah.

susan dominus

It turned out they had a lot in common.

cheese

So we both definitely had a bit of dark humor.

archived recording (shiway barry)

It hasn’t even been five minutes, and we already have one death each.

archived recording (cheese)

Well, I mean, what can you expect? It is us?

archived recording (shiway barry)

We are very good at the game, aren’t we?

susan dominus

They bonded over the freedom the game gave them to be alternate versions of themselves.

cheese

So the thing about being online is that you can have a certain personality online that you wouldn’t really do in real life, like being extremely violent in the video game.

susan dominus

They relished the feeling of defeating an opponent — sometimes other players, but just as often each other.

archived recording (cheese)

I’m not taking blame for that because it was only retaliation.

archived recording (shiway barry)

It was.

cheese

So originally, we were mostly talking in “Minecraft” chat, but then, after a while, we started having voice calls because we’re both like, yeah, I trust this person.

archived recording (shiway barry)

Oh, wait, I just realized something. I can tell you where everything is!

cheese

Oh, yeah, this could be the ultimate partnership.

susan dominus

As the months went by, talking to Guinea became the way Cheese started his day.

cheese

One of the first things I’d do when I woke up is log on to Discord and send her a message.

susan dominus

And her voice was the last thing he heard before falling asleep.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

They’d talk about all kinds of things that had nothing to do with “Minecraft.”

cheese

So me and Guinea definitely bonded a bit over the fact that we both had siblings who we were both very annoyed with at times.

susan dominus

Such as having little sisters who both happened to be Girl Scouts.

cheese

And they are so similar. So we’re like, they’re the same person.

susan dominus

For a long time, Cheese didn’t even know what Guinea’s real name was or what she looked like. But eventually he found out that her name was Shiway, and that she was tall with brown hair and glasses. And even though they spent most of their time battling on “Minecraft,” she started to get to know her tender side. In one of the only photos she ever sent him, she was nuzzling one of her pet Guinea pigs.

cheese

She mentioned her Guinea pigs. We called them her rats.

susan dominus

Mm-hmm.

cheese

That was the major thing that she talked about a bunch, and wanting to be a veterinarian.

susan dominus

He didn’t really know anyone quite like her.

cheese

The reason that her wanting to become a veterinarian came up is because we were all bringing up, like, what do you think you’d want your career to be? And I didn’t think most of the people had an idea of what they really wanted to be besides Guinea.

susan dominus

Did you ever say like, you’re my best friend, or anything like that? It was just, no, you didn’t have to say it.

cheese

So one day, it was like a truth or dare thing. We were asking like, who would you say is like your best friend out of this group? And me and Guinea are just like, each other. And that’s when we really clarified, like, yes, we are best friends.

susan dominus

Aww. Which is its own thing, right? It’s like it’s pretty amazing to be someone’s best friend.

cheese

Yeah.

susan dominus

Earlier this year, Cheese planned to go visit Guinea. He’d finally see her in person.

They would meet in New York with their families, have some adventures IRL as fun as the ones they had online. It was the thing that kept him going, knowing he’d meet her soon. He knew it would be just like it always was, only better.

^crystal cathcart

^ He — this is like, for Christmas, he asked me to get him like a really nice PlayStation. I forgot whatever the number is right now, but it was —

dwayne betts

Last Christmas, Elijah Gomez begged his Aunt Crystal for the same thing that so many 14-year-old kids asked for that year — a PlayStation 5.

dwayne betts

And trust me, those PlayStations were hard to get, because I tried.

^crystal cathcart

^ Hard to get, and so expensive! And I was like, dude, [LAUGHS]: are you kidding me? You and —

dwayne betts

Crystal couldn’t find a PlayStation 5 anywhere on the internet. But she did manage to get a used PlayStation 4. And when Elijah opened that gift on Christmas morning, she knew that it was worth it. For months, Elijah would stay up to 2:00 in the morning playing “Minecraft,” “Fortnite,” and laughing so loud that it woke up his mom.

crystal cathcart

And that was something I would just go nuts about because he’s just up playing the games, and I can hear him yelling.

[laughs]

And I just always say, you sound like a little girl. He’s just like screeching at the top of his lungs, or like laughing. And it was crazy because Elijah had a really deep voice.

dwayne betts

Until one day, out of the blue —

crystal cathcart

He asked me if I could take him to the pawn shop to pawn his PlayStation. And my sister got him that. So I told him, I was like, you gotta talk Auntie Crystal, because she is gonna to kill you. [LAUGHS]

dwayne betts

— Elijah decided that he didn’t want his PlayStation anymore.

crystal cathcart

And then he sold it a couple of months ago because he was on his game too much, and he just wanted to be outside. And like, what 14-year-old is like playing video games too much? I need to be outside?

dwayne betts

Elijah was always outside. Even in a freezing Connecticut winter, he’d often text his best friend, trying to convince him to get out the house.

crystal cathcart

Like some days in the winter, Elijah would text and be like, let’s go to the basketball court. He’s like, do you know how cold it is outside? And it was like, I don’t care. I want to be outside. It’s great!

dwayne betts

In part, this love of the outdoors was in his blood. Elijah’s father was from a family of whalers in Cape Verde. His grandfather would take Elijah out on his boat and teach him how to fish. Sometimes he’d even let Elijah steer. And Elijah would sit there turning the wheel as if headed to somewhere he remembered.

crystal cathcart

I would take my boys, and I would show them how you can speak back to the birds —

[laughs]

— by mimicking their whistle.

dwayne betts

Elijah’s mom would take him and his brother out hiking.

jennifer cathcart

I would show them signs of animals that were around. So like there’s like the Fisher cats you’ve gotta look out for, and the bobcats and stuff. So it’d show them like markings on the trees, or like certain footprints and stuff like that.

dwayne betts

On the way home, they walk along the railroad tracks, and she’d teach Elijah how to kneel and place a hand on the ground to detect distant trains — the ones that could be felt but not heard.

jennifer cathcart

I think it was Elijah that found like a piece of iron that was for the railroad, I think. And it was like in the shape of a J. And him knowing that my name was Jennifer, he gave it to me. [LAUGHS]

dwayne betts

But even for a family that spent a lot of time outside, Elijah’s devotion to the outdoors and everything in it came as a surprise.

jennifer cathcart

He was infatuated with bees.

[laughs]

And once he learned that bees were going extinct, or could be going extinct — I forgot how his teacher put it — he was really big on educating people about that.

dwayne betts

Once time, Elijah was sitting with another kid.

jennifer cathcart

They were sitting on the outside picnic table that was for their age. And I see Elijah just like moving his hands, and his face is looking real serious. And I’m thinking like they’re arguing. So I go outside. I’m like, what’s going on? And he’s like, I’m telling him about the bees.

[laughs]

I’m just like, what?

dwayne betts

That interest in bees did not diminish with time.

jennifer cathcart

Fast-forward to a few years later. Elijah’s YouTube was connected to my YouTube as like the parents control. So it was kind of like he was embarrassed because when I went in his room, he kind of hit his phone. So I’m like, all right

So the video ended up coming on to my YouTube, and he was actually watching a bee insemination on YouTube. And I was like, who finds that? [LAUGHS]

crystal cathcart

[LAUGHS]:

jennifer cathcart

So he must have been like looking up videos on YouTube of how to —

dwayne betts

How to save the bees.

crystal cathcart

Yes, the bees! And that’s what came up. And I watched the whole thing. And I was just like, oh my god! Because it was like, it was a lot.

dwayne betts

Elijah paid attention to the world. His Aunt Crystal would take him to nature preserves, and he spent his time picking up the debris that littered the Earth.

crystal cathcart

But he would just get so sad whenever there was trash on the ground. And people would throw, like, entire apartments’ worth of stuff, all this huge stuff, into the preserve. And he would, like, be moved to almost cry because he was so sad to see the Earth treated so poorly.

dwayne betts

Elijah would walk along the preserve wearing his Avengers T-shirt and carrying a small plastic trash bag. With his slight arms and slender fingers, he’d collect bottle tops half-buried in the sand. He’d reach into rock crevices to pull out bits of plastic foam. He’d pick up the torn pages of old homework that drifted over from a nearby school. He’d take away all the things that he knew could kill the small fish that came in when the tide rose.

Sometimes he stumbled on things that astonished him, like the afternoon he found a television in the woods, sitting on the ground, the plug dangling behind it in the leaves. Elijah was transfixed by the image — as if some kids have ventured out and turned that castoff television into an opportunity to imagine another world.

archived recording 1

Hallelujah!

linda villarosa

Every Sunday, Heaven’s View Baptist Church in Lebanon, Tennessee streams its services on Facebook.

archived recording 1

Hallelujah!

linda villarosa

It’s a small-town church in a modest building, known for its intergenerational choir.

archived recording 1

Hallelujah!

linda villarosa

In this one video from August, you can see the choir gathering in a semi-circle at the front of the sanctuary. They’re dressed up in the colors they’ve chosen for that day, burnt orange and cream. The choir alternates between solemn hymns —

archived recording 1

Hallelujah!

linda villarosa

— and lively gospel spirituals.

archived recording 1

What you know about Jesus? He’s all right. Tell me, what you know about Jesus? He’s all right.

linda villarosa

They sway and clap in front of the congregation.

And at about the 21-minute mark, a five-year-old boy named LaVonte’e Williams walks up to the choir. He stands there between the microphones, leaning into his mom’s waist as she sings and taps her feet. LaVonte’e , whose nickname is LJ, is not really sure what to do with his hands, so he just kind of swings him around and fans himself like the old folks do.

Eventually, the choir finds their seats, and a guest pastor delivers that week’s sermon.

archived recording 1

[INAUDIBLE]

linda villarosa

And after she’s done, she invites anyone there who would like to be baptized to come up.

archived recording 2

Do we have anyone who would like to be baptized?

linda villarosa

And as a handful of church members step forward, out of the view of the camera, five-year-old LJ walks up with his sister.

archived recording 2

Amen, you got a five - and a six-year-old coming to [INAUDIBLE] Jesus [INAUDIBLE].

linda villarosa

And when the pastor asked LJ why he came forward, he announces, I want to be baptized and saved.

LaVonte’e was from a religious family.

- And he was like —

linda villarosa

Tell me about his early life, like —

linda villarosa

And they told me that they weren’t really surprised that LJ wanted to profess his faith.

michael jones

But he was not your average five-year-old.

miracle jones

Mm-mm.

michael jones

I’ve seen a lot of kids, and kids his age, and he was an old soul. He was an old soul.

linda villarosa

LJ’s parents and grandparents said he wasn’t like other kids.

miracle jones

He loved music.

michael jones

And he loved listening to the Word.

miracle jones

Yeah.

michael jones

And it’s funny, because he would take in recite back to you what either I said or another preacher said. And it’s like, he was actually listening?

miracle jones

He definitely wasn’t your average child that is in church. You can see most kids, and they’re either playing on their tablets, playing on somebody’s phone, or asleep. LJ was up front and center in the choir stand, singing with me, and his aunties, and everybody else.

linda villarosa

Are kids usually in the choir that young?

miracle jones

No.

michael jones

No.

archived recording (levonte'e williams)

I love you, Mommy!

archived recording (miracle jones)

Yes!

archived recording (levonte'e williams)

And I love you, Sissy. And I love you, Daddy.

linda villarosa

He had an older sister.

miracle jones

They were inseparable. The older they got, where she went, he went, and vice versa. He was her protector, even though he was a year younger. He didn’t play about his sister at all.

linda villarosa

But somehow in his mind, he was still the big brother.

michael jones

It was hard for us to explain to him that, no, you’re the little brother.

miracle jones

[LAUGHS]:

tanika jones

And he little.

michael jones

And he would always say, I’m not little! I am a big boy!

miracle jones

I am a big boy!

tanika jones

[WHOOPS]:

miracle jones

[LAUGHS]:

michael jones

[LAUGHS]:

linda villarosa

It’s like he didn’t know he was five years old.

michael jones

And when they would come over, it’s straight bee line.

miracle jones

Uh-huh.

michael jones

I’m not there, he’s still running, and he runs upstairs. And then he comes into the bedroom. And he looks at me, and he says, hi, Pop Pop! You feel OK today?

And for someone to be so young —

miracle jones

Yeah.

michael jones

— he was so caring.

miracle jones

Yeah.

michael jones

He was so caring.

miracle jones

He wouldn’t let me touch nothing. Mommy, put that bag down. I got it. OK.

tanika jones

Mm.

miracle jones

OK.

tanika jones

Right!

michael jones

No one had to teach this little boy any of that. It was almost like God said, poof! I’m putting him down there, and he’s going to share with them a different way.

tanika jones

Yep.

miracle jones

Mm.

archived recording (miracle jones)

[LAUGHS]: I’ll see you tomorrow!

archived recording (levonte'e williams)

I’ll see you tomorrow!

archived recording (miracle jones)

[LAUGHS]:

linda villarosa

On August 14, one week after he stepped forward, LJ went back to Heaven’s View for his baptism. Most of his family was there and when he saw his grandma — or Gigi, as he liked to call her — she asked if he understood what it meant to be baptized.

tanika jones

We talked about the purpose for baptism and what it stood for. I said, but you have to believe first. He said, I do! I believe! I believe that He died for me, and He died for you, and we’re OK. And I said, yes, sir!

And he did this weird little dance with his legs and was like, I’m ready to go! And I said, do you have any questions? And LJ said, is the water gonna be cold?

[LAUGHS]

miracle jones

That’s what he asked!

tanika jones

Is the water cold? Because Gigi, you know, I don’t like cold water. He said, I don’t like cold water. Can we put some heat in it?

miracle jones

[LAUGHS]:

tanika jones

[INAUDIBLE] So I don’t think that’s how it works, baby. It’s not gonna work that way.

linda villarosa

You wouldn’t really know LJ was nervous from watching the service that day.

archived recording 3

[INAUDIBLE] this morning, if you’re able to clap your hands, clap your hands and make some noise for the Lord this morning.

[APPLAUSE]

linda villarosa

As the choir, in shades of yellow this time, sings, “It’s your Season”—

archived recording 3

It’s your season, [INAUDIBLE].

linda villarosa

— there’s LJ, back in his usual spot, bouncing around in front of his mom. He’s hiked — clapping his hands, jumping up and down, wearing a green shirt with a little yellow and black truck on it. And finally, toward the end of the service —

archived recording 3

It is time to go down into the water. [INAUDIBLE], Hallelujah!

linda villarosa

It’s time for the baptism.

archived recording 3

Take me to the water —

linda villarosa

LJ changes into clothes that are OK to get wet.

archived recording 3

— to the water —

linda villarosa

— and waits his turn.

archived recording 3

— to be baptized.

linda villarosa

Eventually, the church deacon brings him forward and lowers him into a large, black basin onto his knees. LJ looks around, unsure of himself. And then —

archived recording 3

Oh!

linda villarosa

— he breaks into tears. The water is very cold.

archived recording 3

From LaVonte’e , in the name of the Father, and the name of the Son, and in the precious name of the Holy Ghost, we indeed baptize you.

linda villarosa

The pastor dips him backward.

archived recording 3

In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost, amen!

linda villarosa

It happens in an instant.

archived recording 3

You’ve saved this soul, so it’s done. Amen! Amen! Now, [INAUDIBLE] chilled my body, but not my soul.

linda villarosa

And with that, Brother Lavante’e Williams is baptized.

archived recording 3

Hey! Anybody else? (SINGING) In the water — [INAUDIBLE] all the trouble —

I can [INAUDIBLE] claim the name of Jesus, that there are more people that’s gonna get baptized in the name of [INAUDIBLE],, with [INAUDIBLE] the Holy Ghost, and [INAUDIBLE]..

michael barbaro

August 15, the day after his baptism LaVonte’e Williams accidentally shot himself at a park where he had gone to play basketball. He had just finished his first full day of kindergarten.

Elijah Gomez was shot and killed on May 9 while walking home from school on a trail that passed by the homes of his mother and his aunt. He died surrounded by evergreen trees.

Shiway Barry, or guineapigguard as she was known on “Minecraft“, was killed on April at her home in Minnesota. Shiway, her little sister Sadie, and both of their parents were shot by a cousin who had once lived with their family.

We’ll be right back.

Here’s what else you need to know today. On Tuesday night, a House committee voted to publicly release the tax returns of former President Trump — an unprecedented move that ended his years-long legal battle to keep the documents confidential. The Democratically-controlled Ways and Means Committee said that the disclosure was necessary to highlight the failure of the Internal Revenue Service to audit Trump’s returns while he was president despite a program that makes such audits mandatory. Republicans called it a partisan move to try to embarrass Trump before their party takes over the House in January.

Today’s episode was narrated by writers and contributors to the “Times Magazine.” The essay on Shiway Barry was read by Susan Dominus and features the voice of Shiway’s best friend, Cheese. The essay on Elijah Gomez was read by Dwayne Betts and features the voices of Elijah’s Aunt, Crystal Cathcart, and mother, Jennifer Cathcart. Finally, the essay on LaVonte’e Williams was read by Linda Villarosa and features the voices of LaVonte’e ‘s mother, Miracle Jones, and grandparents Michael and Tanika Jones.

The episode was produced by Asthaa Chaturvedi and Stella Tan. It was edited by Anita Badejo and Michael Benoit, contains original music by Elisheba Ittoop, Marion Lozano, and Dan Powell, and sound design by Elisheba Ittoop. It was engineered by Chris Wood. Our theme music is by Jim Brunberg and Ben Landsverk of Wunderly.

Special thanks to Ilena Silverman, Adrienne Greene, Brandy Martin, Tanisha Torres, Yanely Henriquez and Clay Hardy.

That’s it for “The Daily.” I’m Michael Barbaro. See you tomorrow.

Asthaa Chaturvedi and

Anita Badejo and

Elisheba IttoopMarion Lozano and


This episode contains descriptions of violence.

At the end of every year, The New York Times Magazine devotes an issue to remembering those who have died in the past year.

This year’s focus is gun violence, which is now the leading cause of death for American children, and the short lives that ended far too soon because of it.

Today, we remember three of them: Lavonte’e Williams, Elijah Gomez and Shiway Barry.


  • The voices of Shiway Barry’s best friend who goes by Cheese; Crystal Cathcart, Elijah Gomez’s aunt, and his mother, Jennifer Cathcart; and Lavonte’e Williams’s mother, Miracle Jones, and Michael Jones and Tanika Jones, his grandparents.

Image
From left: Sadie and her elder sister Shiway; Lavonte’e; and Elijah.Credit...From left: via Barry family; Miracle Jones; Jennifer Cathcart

There are a lot of ways to listen to The Daily. Here’s how.

We aim to make transcripts available the next workday after an episode’s publication. You can find them at the top of the page.


Fact-checked by Renee Michael, Jordan Reed, Mark Van de Walle.

Special thanks to Ilena Silverman, Adrienne Greene, Brandy Martin, Tanisha Torres, Yanely Henriquez and Clay Hardy.

Sound design by Elisheba Ittoop.

The Daily is made by Lisa Tobin, Rachel Quester, Lynsea Garrison, Clare Toeniskoetter, Paige Cowett, Michael Simon Johnson, Brad Fisher, Chris Wood, Jessica Cheung, Stella Tan, Alexandra Leigh Young, Lisa Chow, Eric Krupke, Marc Georges, Luke Vander Ploeg, M.J. Davis Lin, Dan Powell, Dave Shaw, Sydney Harper, Robert Jimison, Mike Benoist, Liz O. Baylen, Asthaa Chaturvedi, Rachelle Bonja, Diana Nguyen, Marion Lozano, Corey Schreppel, Anita Badejo, Rob Szypko, Elisheba Ittoop, Chelsea Daniel, Mooj Zadie, Patricia Willens, Rowan Niemisto, Jody Becker, Rikki Novetsky, John Ketchum, Nina Feldman, Will Reid, Carlos Prieto, Sofia Milan, Ben Calhoun and Susan Lee.

Our theme music is by Jim Brunberg and Ben Landsverk of Wonderly. Special thanks to Sam Dolnick, Paula Szuchman, Lisa Tobin, Larissa Anderson, Cliff Levy, Lauren Jackson, Julia Simon, Mahima Chablani, Desiree Ibekwe, Wendy Dorr, Elizabeth Davis-Moorer, Jeffrey Miranda, Renan Borelli, Maddy Masiello and Nell Gallogly.

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