Disclaimer: This post is from GomerBlog, a satirical site about healthcare.
The FDA today approved Peaceaudi (idongivafumab) injection for the treatment of medical burnout.
"Medical burnout is a serious condition, which affects thousands of doctors across the country. The effects of burnout have untold consequences, and could significantly shorten the careers of physicians if untreated," said Arnold J. Palmer, MD, assistant to the regional manager for drug development at the FDA.
"This announcement marks the first time a drug has been specifically approved to treat medical burnout. Idongivafumab's unique ability to target and inhibit C-suite peptides, as well the entire electronic health record (EHR) cascade, represents a quantum leap in burnout science," Palmer explained in a statement.
"Clinical test subjects also noted a marked decrease in symptoms of Entitled Patient Pruritus (EPP) during the course of treatment. Some 87% of those treated stated they felt ready to type at a keyboard with their back to the patient; feeling a need to apply to law school, write a novel, or sell crafts on Etsy fell by a whopping 98%. This drug may truly revolutionize health care."
Due to molecular instability, idongivafumab can only be administered as a continuous infusion in locales of extreme tranquility. As of press time, the only locations certified to be sufficiently tranquil were Tahiti, the Maldives, and the Deplar Farm Hotel in Iceland.
After a two-week treatment course, subjects reported positive effects lasting at least 3 weeks, and even up to 6 weeks. A repeat treatment course was required in 24% of tests subjects. With a typical cost of treatment estimated to cost $212,000, the makers of idongivafumab are working to ensure that this new treatment will be covered by all major insurance carriers.