The fifth stage of grief is what is known as the upward turn. When I first started blogging about the seven stages of grief I mentioned that everyone experiences them at different times and maybe even out of order. The upward turn is simply the feelings you have once the depression begins to lift. For some people this doesn’t necessarily mean that the depression is gone but it is initially when the loss you experienced isn’t the dominating thought in your mind anymore.
For me, I felt as though this stage came after the initial painful phase. As I got used to the fact that I would be living day to day without my father, it was as though a large weight was being lifted off of my shoulders. I slowly began to appreciate the people around me again. The time in my life when I was going through the upward turn is a bit of a blur. I think my emotions had been through a whirlwind and I didn’t have anymore-mental capability to handle much more. It is strange to look back on that time because it feels as though I could’ve handled anything life threw at me. I had just lost my father and I was invincible to any other sort of pain or tragedy. I felt like since I had been through the worst that I could never feel as upset as I had been ever again.
In a strange way, it was almost as if I was in a stage of euphoria. Every time I felt myself feeling happy it was as though nothing else in the world mattered. I was able to appreciate every little thing. This is one of the main changes that I experienced after my loss, a greater sense of appreciation. My friends, my family, my life, everything became much more meaningful to me.
I never thought I would be able to feel happy ever again after I lost my father. This is why when I look back on this time in my life I feel a sense of accomplishment. I was able to come out of the initial loss as a stronger and greater person. I was able to continue on my junior year of high school with a sense of confidence and appreciation. Even though I experienced my depression stage after my initial upward turn, I still believe that it shows the strength I was able to give myself after losing one of the most important people in my life. Something that continues to help me even to this day is being able to look back on this time in my life. I am able to remember the strong and confident girl that was able to overcome the unbelievable pain and suffering of the loss of her father.
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the upward turn